Going on...

Most times, I know the reasons that I keep going. That's why I'm still here & not jumping off of a bridge some place when things get discouraging or I think of the "real world". Its really difficult to lose those you love and friends who disappear. Trusting then being hurt. Being handed more confusion after some questions are answered.

Is it REALLY that difficult to find a man who understands and cares about things as I do? Even if just as a friend. Has the world become so shallow that is next to impossible? I tell myself that I can't be that rare of a bird but where do the other birds like me flock together? I can't even find a female friend who fits this.

Sex is wonderful but falls flat without the rest. So, I've almost forgotten what it is like to have love & sex together. I wonder if I'm going to keep getting older alone. It also seems impossible that one person can approach another and actually relate that they are not just wanting sex or to be judged on the desirability scale. I really feel that I do not fit in this world at all. Actually, I've never thought so.

I need to find the other planet that others like me go & save my money for a ticket.