It is so very difficult to live in a world that most everyone is only interested in fulfillment of self and there is no respect for others nor the self. There is no honor. All is forgotten that we all are the same and should treat each other with love. Nothing else matters in the end. Even though egos, material wants and what we think we must have at all costs including other people and any opportunity, even walking all over and using others, run rampant and convince us otherwise. It is all about self. All about each person. It is not about anyone else at all. Just one's self. Such sadness we create in the world and, ultimately, in ourselves when we live this way. Karma is not just for those who feel justified. It is for everyone. Good and not good. Love is all that matters. And what is not of love can only bring pain.
No matter what others may do to me or what happens around me, I will still walk in the spirit of love and peace because I know what truly matters. We are all the same and we each matter. What does not matter are the petty things we create in this world that are not love, not respectful, and are not honorable. Nothing can deter me from that. No matter what price I must pay. My heart and soul are my conscious and will always be with me as my guide forever.
As the Lord said, Love One Another as I Love you, And I obey my Lord. Peace.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Sunday, November 21, 2004
Discovery
Something I wrote to someone....
This comes from my soul.......You did not used to be like most everyone else. You used to be all feeling.I remember. We both are very unique in that we were blessed to feel more than others.There is a purpose to this we have yet to see. I am just at the start of my journeyto practice this. My purpose will become clear when it is time. The discovery waswas a struggling lifetime to get to. But I am here.Of course, I used to think I was all good and knew all of the answers.And all feeling. I was bottled up just like you became. And are.We kinda have switched places. Just in a different way.I believe your soul called me for a reason. You knew it was time.There are stages that our spirits go through if we grow.Some people never go past some stages.Others go back and forth between them, others may just go back & forth a time or two.Until they figure it out. I think you are still "figuring it out."We humans do get caught up in our pleasure, pain, wants, desires, and comfort.Defining love to suit our own needs. We seek out others to define ourselves andfulfill us. These others are just like us. They seek to feel.We don't get past our own selves.We don't feel our souls.We look for everything and do everything to numb the feelings that try to direct usback to our souls. It takes a very powerful lesson to cause us to see ourselves aswe really are and to see the truth.The truth is not based on us at all. Nothing we can do to ourselves can change the truth.Our souls know. God knows. He is truth and love. All love. Love is of the spirit.He is feeling. He is all.Your soul is still the same as it always was. It speaks to you. Listen.God bless you, my love.". . . you cannot know yourself if you deny what you see. . ." J. Krishnamurti
This comes from my soul.......You did not used to be like most everyone else. You used to be all feeling.I remember. We both are very unique in that we were blessed to feel more than others.There is a purpose to this we have yet to see. I am just at the start of my journeyto practice this. My purpose will become clear when it is time. The discovery waswas a struggling lifetime to get to. But I am here.Of course, I used to think I was all good and knew all of the answers.And all feeling. I was bottled up just like you became. And are.We kinda have switched places. Just in a different way.I believe your soul called me for a reason. You knew it was time.There are stages that our spirits go through if we grow.Some people never go past some stages.Others go back and forth between them, others may just go back & forth a time or two.Until they figure it out. I think you are still "figuring it out."We humans do get caught up in our pleasure, pain, wants, desires, and comfort.Defining love to suit our own needs. We seek out others to define ourselves andfulfill us. These others are just like us. They seek to feel.We don't get past our own selves.We don't feel our souls.We look for everything and do everything to numb the feelings that try to direct usback to our souls. It takes a very powerful lesson to cause us to see ourselves aswe really are and to see the truth.The truth is not based on us at all. Nothing we can do to ourselves can change the truth.Our souls know. God knows. He is truth and love. All love. Love is of the spirit.He is feeling. He is all.Your soul is still the same as it always was. It speaks to you. Listen.God bless you, my love.". . . you cannot know yourself if you deny what you see. . ." J. Krishnamurti
Sunday, October 17, 2004
Love yourself :-)
I continue to learn from others. After thinking of all that I did on Friday, I had some revelations that were new to me in some ways. I could feel that I had crossed a few more milestones. This is helped so by not having a radio in the car. LOL
Being poor (as all things) has its blessings when we choose to see them.
One of the wisdoms I saw was that no matter what it may be (emotional,attitude, gender, chemical, your job, physical, just something you don't like about your life, or you don't feel right about "you",whatever), if you don't address it and "get right with yourself", you will never be comfortable in your own skin. Your life will never seem to go as you want it. There are people that won't click with you when you do get it all together but that is their problem, not yours. There is a tendency to put our faith in other people way too much. It is the desire to be loved and accepted. This is good but never when we hold it ahead of the health of ourselves. Only being whole can we truly express the love that we are and we will receive it back tenfold. To be less than ourselves distracts us and we are in such pain that we cannot truly see the true love in and all around us. We are here to love.
(Not to get into "religion" here :-) just a basic fact) For me, Jesus showed the way best. He came & endured all of this and more. He was who He was no matter what. I do believe God sent Him to show us the way. For others, it may be someone else or another way. I do not question any longer. I just seek to understand and love.
On a basic spiritual level, We are all given choices of everything about our lives. We can do and be anything we choose. I feel one reason this"is" relates to our charting our paths and fulfilling our purposes in life. Without us having such freedom, it just could not be done as God wants it to be. If restrictions were placed on us at all, love would never be done. Love is everything.
Being poor (as all things) has its blessings when we choose to see them.
One of the wisdoms I saw was that no matter what it may be (emotional,attitude, gender, chemical, your job, physical, just something you don't like about your life, or you don't feel right about "you",whatever), if you don't address it and "get right with yourself", you will never be comfortable in your own skin. Your life will never seem to go as you want it. There are people that won't click with you when you do get it all together but that is their problem, not yours. There is a tendency to put our faith in other people way too much. It is the desire to be loved and accepted. This is good but never when we hold it ahead of the health of ourselves. Only being whole can we truly express the love that we are and we will receive it back tenfold. To be less than ourselves distracts us and we are in such pain that we cannot truly see the true love in and all around us. We are here to love.
(Not to get into "religion" here :-) just a basic fact) For me, Jesus showed the way best. He came & endured all of this and more. He was who He was no matter what. I do believe God sent Him to show us the way. For others, it may be someone else or another way. I do not question any longer. I just seek to understand and love.
On a basic spiritual level, We are all given choices of everything about our lives. We can do and be anything we choose. I feel one reason this"is" relates to our charting our paths and fulfilling our purposes in life. Without us having such freedom, it just could not be done as God wants it to be. If restrictions were placed on us at all, love would never be done. Love is everything.
Saturday, September 18, 2004
Love is Blindness
Gosh, does this hit a spot. Even though I do know what love is for real now.
Love is blindness in several ways. We love by accepting which is a "blindness"
to faults in some respects. We do see but overlook because they don't matter.
Blindness is not always not seeing. The blind "see" things in ways that those with
sight can not even dream of.
I hear this as more what it is like when we are selfish, sick, or deny the love
that is around us everywhere.
I guess this is my past coming back to still haunt me.
Plus, the hope I have still burning for my husband still hurting.
"Love Is Blindness"
Love is blindness I don't want to see
Won't you wrap the night Around me
Oh my heart Love is blindness
In a parked car In a crowded street
You see your love Made complete
Thread is ripping The knot is slipping
Love is blindness Love is clockworks
And cold steel Fingers too numb to feel
Squeeze the handle Blow out the candle
Love is blindness
Love is blindness I don't want to see
Won't you wrap the night Around me
Oh my love Blindness
A little death Without mourning
No call And no warning
Baby...a dangerous idea That almost makes sense
Love is drowning In a deep well
All the secrets And no one to tell
Take the money Honey
Blindness
Love is blindness I don't want to see
Won't you wrap the night Around me
Oh my love
Blindness
Love is blindness in several ways. We love by accepting which is a "blindness"
to faults in some respects. We do see but overlook because they don't matter.
Blindness is not always not seeing. The blind "see" things in ways that those with
sight can not even dream of.
I hear this as more what it is like when we are selfish, sick, or deny the love
that is around us everywhere.
I guess this is my past coming back to still haunt me.
Plus, the hope I have still burning for my husband still hurting.
"Love Is Blindness"
Love is blindness I don't want to see
Won't you wrap the night Around me
Oh my heart Love is blindness
In a parked car In a crowded street
You see your love Made complete
Thread is ripping The knot is slipping
Love is blindness Love is clockworks
And cold steel Fingers too numb to feel
Squeeze the handle Blow out the candle
Love is blindness
Love is blindness I don't want to see
Won't you wrap the night Around me
Oh my love Blindness
A little death Without mourning
No call And no warning
Baby...a dangerous idea That almost makes sense
Love is drowning In a deep well
All the secrets And no one to tell
Take the money Honey
Blindness
Love is blindness I don't want to see
Won't you wrap the night Around me
Oh my love
Blindness
Feeling
Intransigence n : the trait of being intransigent; stubbornly refusing to compromise
"Staring At The Sun"
Summer stretching on the grass... summer dresses pass
In the shade of a willow tree creeps a crawling over me
Over me and over you stuck together with God's glue
It's going to get stickier too...
t's been a long hot summer let's go undercover
Don't try too hard to think... don't think at all
I'm not the only one starin' at the sun
Afraid of what you'd find if you took a look inside
Not just deaf and dumb i'm staring at the sun
Not the only one who's happy to go blind
There's an insect in your ear if you scratch it won't disappear
It's gonna itch and burn and sting
Do you want to see what the scratching brings
Waves that leave me out of reach
Breaking on your back like a beach...
Will we ever live in peace?
Cause those that can't do often have to
Those that can't do often have to... preach
To the ones staring at the sun...
Afraid of what you'll find if you took a look inside
Not just deaf and dumb... staring at the sun
I'm not the only one who'd rather go blind
Intransigence is all around... military is still in town
Armour plated suits and ties... daddy just won't say goodbye
Referee won't blow the whistle God is good but will HE listen
I'm nearly great But there's something I'm missing
I left in the duty free Though you never really belonged to me
You're not the only one staring at the sun
Afraid of what you'd find if you stepped back inside
I'm not sucking my thumb I'm staring at the sun
Not the only one who's happy to go blind
"Staring At The Sun"
Summer stretching on the grass... summer dresses pass
In the shade of a willow tree creeps a crawling over me
Over me and over you stuck together with God's glue
It's going to get stickier too...
t's been a long hot summer let's go undercover
Don't try too hard to think... don't think at all
I'm not the only one starin' at the sun
Afraid of what you'd find if you took a look inside
Not just deaf and dumb i'm staring at the sun
Not the only one who's happy to go blind
There's an insect in your ear if you scratch it won't disappear
It's gonna itch and burn and sting
Do you want to see what the scratching brings
Waves that leave me out of reach
Breaking on your back like a beach...
Will we ever live in peace?
Cause those that can't do often have to
Those that can't do often have to... preach
To the ones staring at the sun...
Afraid of what you'll find if you took a look inside
Not just deaf and dumb... staring at the sun
I'm not the only one who'd rather go blind
Intransigence is all around... military is still in town
Armour plated suits and ties... daddy just won't say goodbye
Referee won't blow the whistle God is good but will HE listen
I'm nearly great But there's something I'm missing
I left in the duty free Though you never really belonged to me
You're not the only one staring at the sun
Afraid of what you'd find if you stepped back inside
I'm not sucking my thumb I'm staring at the sun
Not the only one who's happy to go blind
Tulsa Mortuary Road Trip!!!!!
Well, did I get to go on a road trip to weirdness or what?
I got 3 hours notice asking me to take my oldest nephew to Tulsa to complete his 6 "assignments" for mortuary school which he had put off off for so long, he had 2 days left to do them or would be out of the school for good. No one cared, was able, or had time to take him except me. Of course, I did it. I called my friend, Barbara, because she had been wanting to go ANYWHERE for a long time and been "crying" CASINO as well. She got ready faster than I would have believed. We were both amazing! LOL
His uncle rented a car, paid for the room, and fronted money for gas & food. Off we went. Of course, it was eventful. I will only touch on the "road trip" aspects.
I will just have to come back (or write this all down someplace else) since it was so weird. LOL 1) Freaky guy at gas station yelling at me because I walked into the storage area ("his office" ???) instead of the bathroom, My nephew got a free candy bar from him afterwards and I wished him peace and good stuff like that on the way out as his mouth fell open); 2) non-stop talking by my nephew which almost drove me crazy. I love him but I would have preferred the stereo. Mortuary and his breakup/get even talk with his girlfriend gets tedious, at best, after 5 hours; 3) Everybody was the driver :-P; 4) Overshot the area of Tulsa we were supposed to be in and the gas guage was on the little gas pump. There was nothing for miles & miles. Barbara & Anthony talked of the movies in which people run out of gas in these kinds of scary places at night. We made it to a gas station. DARN!; 5) Located the mortuary then set out to find a room. Showdown in car that almost had us returning home; Stopped at Super 8 motel. While finding out about a room, clerk had a call for police then a woman burst into the office saying a man broke the window and was trying to kill her. I left. We went over to Tudor Place which was Medieval looking on the outside and cheaper. Later, Anthony said that the guys at the mortuary said they get a lot of hangings & suicides from there and a lot of prostitute deaths from the Super 8. How nice.
6) While Anthony was getting his "assignments" done (these were to be at least 4 embalmings and 2 autopsies), I went with Barbara to the Cherokee Casino. I watched her lose money, bless her heart. She won a few times but I wished she would have won more. Might have shared! LOL This was a brand new place so I guess they were still paying for it. Nice buffet and beautiful! I love the sounds & lights.; 7) I played a nickel machine at which someone won the progressive jackpot while I was sitting at it. Typical.; 8) Anthony came back both times smelling terrible, with blood on him (he brought no other clothes) and telling all about what he had done :P :P He did take baths! :-D His favorite stories were getting to drive limos around Tulsa, tho. LOL; 9) We started back Thursday morning after just having gotten there late Tuesday night. He was all done. On the way back, more mortuary talk. (I want to be cremated). He finally found the backseat of the Olds Alero folded down in the trunk & he went to sleep. He had not slept but a few hours all the time we had been gone; 10) I think, today, I am finally recovered. LOL
When I saw Anthony last night, he was feeling good and said the school was amazed to see him back. (He graduates in November.) I was glad to be able to do my small part, with a crazy road trip, to enable him to do that. Surprised we all 3 are not nuts. :-D
It is good to know that even though I have changed, the interesting life I have always lived, has not. LOL It keeps coming.
I got 3 hours notice asking me to take my oldest nephew to Tulsa to complete his 6 "assignments" for mortuary school which he had put off off for so long, he had 2 days left to do them or would be out of the school for good. No one cared, was able, or had time to take him except me. Of course, I did it. I called my friend, Barbara, because she had been wanting to go ANYWHERE for a long time and been "crying" CASINO as well. She got ready faster than I would have believed. We were both amazing! LOL
His uncle rented a car, paid for the room, and fronted money for gas & food. Off we went. Of course, it was eventful. I will only touch on the "road trip" aspects.
I will just have to come back (or write this all down someplace else) since it was so weird. LOL 1) Freaky guy at gas station yelling at me because I walked into the storage area ("his office" ???) instead of the bathroom, My nephew got a free candy bar from him afterwards and I wished him peace and good stuff like that on the way out as his mouth fell open); 2) non-stop talking by my nephew which almost drove me crazy. I love him but I would have preferred the stereo. Mortuary and his breakup/get even talk with his girlfriend gets tedious, at best, after 5 hours; 3) Everybody was the driver :-P; 4) Overshot the area of Tulsa we were supposed to be in and the gas guage was on the little gas pump. There was nothing for miles & miles. Barbara & Anthony talked of the movies in which people run out of gas in these kinds of scary places at night. We made it to a gas station. DARN!; 5) Located the mortuary then set out to find a room. Showdown in car that almost had us returning home; Stopped at Super 8 motel. While finding out about a room, clerk had a call for police then a woman burst into the office saying a man broke the window and was trying to kill her. I left. We went over to Tudor Place which was Medieval looking on the outside and cheaper. Later, Anthony said that the guys at the mortuary said they get a lot of hangings & suicides from there and a lot of prostitute deaths from the Super 8. How nice.
6) While Anthony was getting his "assignments" done (these were to be at least 4 embalmings and 2 autopsies), I went with Barbara to the Cherokee Casino. I watched her lose money, bless her heart. She won a few times but I wished she would have won more. Might have shared! LOL This was a brand new place so I guess they were still paying for it. Nice buffet and beautiful! I love the sounds & lights.; 7) I played a nickel machine at which someone won the progressive jackpot while I was sitting at it. Typical.; 8) Anthony came back both times smelling terrible, with blood on him (he brought no other clothes) and telling all about what he had done :P :P He did take baths! :-D His favorite stories were getting to drive limos around Tulsa, tho. LOL; 9) We started back Thursday morning after just having gotten there late Tuesday night. He was all done. On the way back, more mortuary talk. (I want to be cremated). He finally found the backseat of the Olds Alero folded down in the trunk & he went to sleep. He had not slept but a few hours all the time we had been gone; 10) I think, today, I am finally recovered. LOL
When I saw Anthony last night, he was feeling good and said the school was amazed to see him back. (He graduates in November.) I was glad to be able to do my small part, with a crazy road trip, to enable him to do that. Surprised we all 3 are not nuts. :-D
It is good to know that even though I have changed, the interesting life I have always lived, has not. LOL It keeps coming.
Sunday, September 5, 2004
Peace & Joy!!!
I've got peace in my heart, I've got peace in my soul, flowing like a river into the depths of who I am and I am sure of who I am. Sweet peace. :-)
I've got joy in my heart, I've got joy in my soul, flowing like a fountain into the depths of who I am and I am sure of who I am. :-D
In love with life! Life is good.
Love one another as you want to be loved.
Being poor in money is minor to all the wonder of the riches of living, friendship, family,
arts, giving, community, & spirit. It is difficult to believe I ever felt any different in life.
Great things are happening! My happiness grows, if that is possible. :-D
I am truly blessed :-D :-D :-D :-D
I've got joy in my heart, I've got joy in my soul, flowing like a fountain into the depths of who I am and I am sure of who I am. :-D
In love with life! Life is good.
Love one another as you want to be loved.
Being poor in money is minor to all the wonder of the riches of living, friendship, family,
arts, giving, community, & spirit. It is difficult to believe I ever felt any different in life.
Great things are happening! My happiness grows, if that is possible. :-D
I am truly blessed :-D :-D :-D :-D
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